Hey, i'd like some advice. Key Takeaways: 1) BPD is a personality disorder and Bipolar is a mood disorder.Very important difference! YOU learn to deal with your rage and your coldness and your cycling. My boyfriend has ghosted me a few time now, anywhere from 2 days to 7days. It was like a different person and she proceeded to rip apart everything; who I was, my character, my looks, my decisions in life, scoffed at love letters I’d sent when I realized she just needed me to be there for her in any way she needed, utterly diminished bot the overall and specific instances of care (e.g. My wife of 7 1/2 years was diagnosed BP2 last year after she went into a depression and moved out and had a short affair with an ex. At this point i have no idea what to do. I made contact with her 2 weeks after the break up but her reply was cold and distant. In reply to Not everyone does this, it… by Anonymous (not verified). If, on the other hand, your spouse refuses treatment, you must learn to protect yourself from abuse. Give the person the option of saying yes or no and then communicate in the way you want unless they ask you not to. Obviously this was going south, how he talked to his parents was horrific, never would take responsibility for his own actions, oh he did in the beginning, told me about his bipolar in a deceptive way and then lied about it. I pointed out that it wouldn’t be too different since her new house was only 6 blocks away. APA ReferenceBlum, H. Well Obviously I had major reservations, and knew I could not take all of this on, it was not safe. That makes me push another person away when they get too close. And been friends and more. Can’t just be an adult and tell me what’s really going on! When your husband is ignoring you, do not ignore him back. He didn't respond we havent spoken since and hes blocked my number. I accepted him anyway because I didnt care (I have a friend who is bipolar so I was familiar with the mental health issue but only on a friend level) during our first 2 months together he went through a hypomanic episode and he allowed me to support him throughout the episode. He is also home with mum and dad at 49. I was shocked and didn’t know what to do. He says he doesn’t mean to ghost but doesn’t know what to say .. Is this typical of bipolar ghosting or is this simply playing games how do I tell the difference ? He did not get on the plane. There were several heated exchanges after that and finally two years later and more heated exchanges, she looked for and bought a house. Did not get me a birthday gift for a pivotal birthday, more odd statements that reflected promiscuous behaviors but when confrontation he goes silent. DBT, Meds, ECT, TMS, all ineffective — Its time docs and therapists started earning their high fees! This method may be great in some cases, but not all. It’s hurtful and I honestly don’t understand how she said she ever loved me to treat me like disposable trash. He is currently jumping locations again across the United States with his mom and wants me to wait an additional 2 years for him to save up money to buy us a house in yet a different location . - Breaking Bipolar. We had “ at that moment. The awareness factor is also the key over here. Then blocked me and hasn’t said a word or message since. The best thing to do in my case is to "apologize" and act like she understands why I'm angry and that it won't happen again, and then after I've calmed down and am no longer upset at all, we talk about the situation more realistically. I… by Anonymous (not verified). He left this weekend to visit family and then I was upset when he turned off his phone. My job has me multitasking for over 400 employees I have to interact with all day. I have had people ignore me, make excuses for the things that are so ridiculous that I find it very difficult to hold my tongue. I called too much, I text something he didn’t like. What about you? All this will do is make youfeel pathetic and make you appear to be needy. In December the week of Christmas I was staying over and he asked if we can do it another time because he was going through something so I gave him space even though I was angry because he did this while I was at work at my job . It is done without a reason or an explanation from the person doing it. Ghosting is a contemporary term used for when a person completely cuts off all communication with a friend or romantic partner by not responding to texts, ignoring calls and acting as if the person no longer exists. Gone thro' the matter. Excellent.This exact journey of my life with bipolar disorder.It has really been so challenging but due to the moral support i get from my beloved immediate Family am living so positive with it.Thank you so much for this enlight. You’re not in this alone, it takes two to manage this illness. I’m pretty sure she would’ve treated me just like that if she’d stayed working where I work. My girlfriend of three and a half years ghosted me. With depression, trauma, and bipolar it's natural to be comfortable with isolating but to deal with this you should fight against your mind and try to always remember that humans are not made to be alone. There are plenty of resources out there, especially bp Magazine. He is with someone else because I found her number on the call log. I went through a mania phase with a women and she just stopped talking to me and blocked her post on FB. In reply to Do bp ghosters ever come… by Anonymous (not verified), HI Ann, I don't have this answer I to am waiting to see of someone with BP response. I have bipolar disorder, and I have extremely terrible outbursts on occasion. Self awareness and thought life are key along with meds and a good support system (counseling, family, friends who work at understanding bipolar), sleeping and eating right. If you do break up, Dr. Saltz recommended making sure your partner has emotional support, and if you’re able to connect them to a mental health professional, that would be helpful. In the city where he lives, my family also lives. I just don't know who he is, what this is, am I in denial and excusing all this behaviour for him having bipolar. Step 1 and 2 of what to do when your husband ignores you. Hannah Blum is the HealthyPlace YouTube bipolar disorder vlogger. For trying to understand someone else’s disease and give them love and support and caring and strength. Some day, your partner will value you all the more! My mother would threaten to kill herself in front of us kids. She said she couldn't expect me to wait for her but she wasn't going to cut me out of her life. After that arguement she said "look you're annoying and I don't want to deal with you at the end of my day - fuck,look I'm just going to smoke some weed and watch some animie and cool off,I'll call you after. The more I focus on the negative things about myself and/or situations the worse I get. It's needed to settle down or because you don't want them to see you like that. my husband and I have been married for three years he has bipolar 1 he has ghosted me almost seven or eight times never staying away for as long as he has this time which is now going on 2 weeks I have tried texting him telling him that I love him that I will help him that I'm not mad at him nothing seems to really help all I could do is pray cry and try to keep my own mental health together which is difficult and I do have three children not with him I have tried support groups I have tried online support this is the most painful experience I've ever felt in my life to be ghosted by somebody who I adore so much and I know he's not happy and I don't know how to make him happy I don't think he really knows and I believe he thinks that my children are his triggers which is even extremely harder as a mother especially since he met me knowing I had children so and I just want you to know I'm also praying for you and it really is not our fault stay strong. Some days, I go in on 2 hours of sleep. Having to move on seems almost impossible, given that I can't even do normal things with this social distancing and isolation. Maybe the disease is responsible for wanting to ghost. Men are not given a fair shake — even in today’s times — in regards to custody. But he didn’t call me or text me from that day. I don’t have to excuse alcoholics who run over kids. Things had been going seemingly well, with a spell here or there that would last a week or two where she would question whether she should be in a relationship. If you husband ignores you and you want to change the behavior, there are some things that you can try. Two months ago I came to the city where he lives and I called him but he suddenly GHOSTED. It could be that you’ve drifted apart and this will help you to come together again. You will slowly and gradually register the fact that the outburst of temper has no real purpose nor does it reap anything positive. Jack, please feel feee to email me colin.lowth2@mail.dcu.ie.... I’ve had a v similar experience, In reply to Jack, please feel feee to… by Anonymous (not verified). It was so much to bear after months of daily up/down with her affection/coldness and my doing everything I could to build her UP and make her feel wanted, beautiful, worthy of living, etc. I had no clue what happened. Thirdly, the stigma of mental illness causes severe anxiety in those of us living with bipolar disorder. She has been untreated bipolar abs an eating disorder. I didn’t know she had bipolar at first I just thought she had some unusual behaviours. I thought of it as isolation but it's like ghosting is the fall out that those around us have to suffer through when we isolate. He sent me message. "I just do this on a low episode. If you want to know why BPD or Bipolar relationships fail, then you’ll want to read this article. Now, unfortunately, this can take from a couple days to a couple weeks." It is exactly what my husband has been doing all the time. In mental-health, you need to know your triggers/boundaries/balances.. it’s critical! Those of us with bipolar disorder subconsciously believe that we are unlovable and undeserving of friendships and relationships, which causes us to act on ghosting. I will try to go when he wants me to. Ex: Early-Childhood Neglect, abuses etc. There is no doubt that this remedy is easier said than done. One month ago, we got into a small argument in which it triggered into him asking for 3 days of space. My ex swings by every so often, wants contact and is quite chatty but then generally just ghosts me, or in other words reads messages but stops replying, even when asked a question. All rights reserved. He goes thru period where he is really communicative and then really uncommunicative. That I should learn to “handle him” better. So maybe divorce IS the best solution. 24 years of that then she divorced him. I don’t know how you can be coping still seeing her at work talking and laughing with everyone else and just ignoring you. I am waiting for your advice. I texted her and asked if I could bring her mail to her. The rules of marriage don’t change just because I’m a person living with bipolar disorder. This used to only happen three to four times a year now we may have 2-3 “good” days as 10 extremely bad ones. #3 You’re too smart to have bipolar disorder. Sometimes the best you can do for someone with bipolar disorder is give them the time they need. ~ Embree, YouTube commenter. I agree with Tony and Nik. I should also add there are different types of bipolar, in Bipolar I I've seen people start using drugs and become very sexually active and manic that way, bipolar II is more irritable, angry and depressed and stuff. I'm in the process of trying to figure out, how do we know this is the end or another episode? In retrospect if I’d known about ‘bipolar rage’ I might have just walked away but maybe not; it was months of being traumatized either by her coldness or her suicidal depression and I’d had enough. Married for 2 years and together for 10 years. Such a shame people get bipolar, you begin to see the illness and not the person they were before. I want to reach out and suggest that she talk to her doctor about psychosis but I’m afraid she’ll follow through with her threats and call the police. I didn’t realize the extent of this problem until I saw the number of comments on my recent YouTube video, "Ghosting and Bipolar Disorder: Why We Do It". She said if she can't make a relationship work with me, she'll never be able to make one work. But the emotional abuse I take is substantial and I feel numb at this point. We would get into ridiculous arguments and her personality had shifted from being kind and empathetic, to being completely void - a bit heartless and cold. During that time she started drinking more and more, going to bed by 8 p.m. and just not her normal self. I don't know. She blocked my number and everything. When I jokingly said that I had been offended to him, he didn’t understand at all and asked what he had done to me. You can also find Hannah on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter. Bipolar disorder and ghosting is a big problem. When you are pulling away and ghosting someone who you were dating, does it bother you if they continue to try and talk to you or is it nice that they are trying to be understanding and there for you? "I’m guilty of this when I’m hypomanic and in a negative mood and I’m super sensitive and I get easily hurt or angry at people and instead of confronting them, I just ghost them when they try to contact me." I work and he is on disability now and I am so afraid that if I file for divorce he will either hurt himself, hurt me and/or the kids or I won’t get full custody and then I fear what happens when I am not around. This time he hasn’t shown back in our town for 2.5 years. When we were together he would often go radio silence off and on and dissapear for days or hours or weeks at a time and ghost but would always reappear . doesn’t work every time. If she's got bipolar I you may be in for some real trouble so watch her behavior and see what you are comfortable with. I do my best to keep a calm home. He was with his best friend. It’s hard to say, if that truly is “exclusive to bp” or if it’s a commonality for other residual-issues in development with relations...ie: family, friends. 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